Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Math According To Kids

Two kids + one snack + one 5 minute desperation shower by mama = peanut butter smeared on table, milk on floor, cracker crumbs everywhere, too much laughter and talk of bodily functions at the table

One sister + one brother + one blanket = adventures in a fort, on a plane, having a picnic, going on a trip

One trip to bank + one trip to post office + one trip to gym + 2 kids = 6 stupid suckers (or 6 tantrums)

One sister + one brother + one sound machine with a thunderstorm setting = hours of playing “thunderstorm” under the sheets of mama and dada’s bed 

Minivan with 7 seats – 4 people in seats = 3 seats left which oldest daughter thinks must be filled with siblings as soon as possible

One hour – time it takes to get 3 people fed, dressed, and in the car = 23 minutes late to everything

One fun event X 3 = meltdown

One fun event X too many kids = meltdown

One fun event X number of hours of advance notice to child of said fun event = epic meltdown

One stick /2 = Yay!  2 sticks!!

One cookie/2 = Tears, tears, tears.  I want a whole one!!! 

Two adults + offspring = Calculus (the mathematical study of how things change and how quickly they change), Game Theory (the study of mathematical models of conflict and cooperation between intelligent rational decision-makers), and E = mc2, where E = energy, m = mass, and c = children.


Jeanette Obelenus said...

i have to say my favorite is 23 minutes late to everything. genius post!

Jamie said...

Thanks, Jeanette! Someday we'll be on time again. :)